This is part 2 of a 3-part series. Part 1 | Part 3

There was a time when I wanted to write a book about sex. Maybe I will someday, hopefully before I lose interest in it, if such a thing happens in a growing marriage. My goal was not so much to say anything new, but I believe that this era deserves as many sane books on sex as possible.

A Vindication of Love: Reclaiming Romance for the Twenty-First Century by Christina Nehring is one from the competition. Her enemy is dull and limited monogamy. Her goal is sexuality out of the conventional box where passions can truly be savored. Nothing new here, but if there is a steady stream of books from the reckless sexuality genre that sound fresh, then I expect that Christians can be making the biblical case for sexuality in new and engaging ways, too.

If I were to write a book on sex, it wouldn’t be on the great sex life of Christians. Those books are certainly worthwhile, given the rap that bounded sex is joyless sex (there is a popular equation that goes like this: Attraction + Obstacles = Excitement), but I find a different emphasis in Scripture. We don’t need too much teaching on how sex can be a good time—that one is pretty obvious—but we always need reminders about how sex within marital boundaries, and only within marital boundaries, is right, good, and deeply human. So, I would write on the merits of sexual self-control until I am fully persuaded. As far as I can tell, self-control is even one of the prominent themes in the Song of Solomon.

Personal discipline at work is good, in athletics it is necessary, but personal discipline in sex is seen as an oxymoron. We might never persuade the rest of the world of the beauty of gospel-inspired, Spirit-empowered self-control, but we—Christ’s church—must be persuaded.


This is part 2 of a 3-part series. Part 1 | Part 3